Relationships are complicated and no matter how much we have the illusion of control, emotions are unpredictable. Revenge sex is one way of trying to take back that sense of control over broken relationships but is it worth it? Are you doing the right thing? Today our article is about revenge sex and its consequences.
What is revenge sex meaning and why do people do it?
When a partner sleeps with another person just to take revenge on a companion, this is called revenge sex. The worst thing here is that most people do this to hurt the other person but end up hurting themselves.
Revenge sex psychology is complex. To understand this, first, we need to understand why people choose revenge sex at the first place as a form of vengeance. As sweet as it sounds, love is a very tricky emotion and everyone has their own version of love. People choose revenge sex because
- As apparent from its name, the act is done to take revenge. Most people do it to teach a lesson to their partner when they face heartbreak in an existing relationship. They think their partner cheated on them so offering themselves to someone else will level up the hurt.
- After a breakup, people feel hurt and heartbreak so they try to do the same with the other person.
- This could be a call for attention. A hurt person thinks, their partner has just lost something valuable by losing them. So they try to show that they are worthy enough to get anyone’s attention.
- Not everyone grieves maturely. The person doing revenge sex usually takes themselves as a “victim”. So to overcome that feeling of helplessness they do revenge sex.
- Though it’s rare, but many people do it for fun too. That is their treat to themselves after a breakup. After a broken relationship, they feel ready to say goodbye, and revenge sex is like a welcome to a new life where they can be with anyone.
Is revenge sex a good idea?
Well, No! Unless you are ready for the fun and you want to do it for your pleasure, breakup sex is never a good idea. Though revenge sex also gives you a feeling of satisfaction for the time being but trust us, you will regret it later on.
To handle emotional trauma, seek professional help or talk to your friends and family. Revenge itself is a burden to hold and doing something this silly is just an addition to your hurt.
What are the consequences of revenge sex?
What seems like the quick idea of payback is actually the beginning of new misery. Legends say “Revenge is a dish better served cold”. So take your good time to think about it.
The consequences of revenge sex could be psychologically severe
- It could take a toll on your mind. Regrets eat you alive. So never go for emotional decisions when you are hitting a low point in life.
- Instead of boosting your confidence, it can shatter your spirit. You don’t need validation of your worth from someone else.
- People think they will feel good afterward but most of the time it happens otherwise. It’s like a bad decision taken at a bad time.
- If not the hurt and the breakup itself, sleeping with someone else will surely cause you pain beyond expectations.
- Revenge sex can trigger trauma and can lead to stress and depression.
- Bad choices can cause anxiety leading to a lack of sleep and deteriorated health.
- In a long run, you start losing your self-respect, focus, and your purpose in life.
How not to do revenge sex?
The whole revenge thing is about “anger”. Anger snatches away our ability to observe, evaluate and conclude things and clouds our better judgment. So what you need to do here is anger management. Most people don’t think about or evaluate situations before indulging in any such activity and rue later on. To avoid any such foolishness here are a few steps to do
- Breakups and cheating do hurt but you need to accept the fact that the other person was no good for you. Realize that they have done you a favor by showing their true colors.
- The best way to take revenge is to ignore someone like they never existed for you. They break your heart now they deserved to be swiped away from your life.
- Resentment and holding grudges are like holding on to their thoughts. Let them go …to hell and move forward with your life.
- You will find someone worthy of your love and attention. Heartbreaker doesn’t even be entitled to worthy of your outrage or revenge.
- If you really think sleeping with someone will hurt your ex-partner, you are wrong. Even if you are true, this means you were living with the psychopath. Dump them anyway.
- Try to involve yourself in healthy activities. Spend more time with friends and family and let yourself open in front of them. This catharsis is important so that rage won’t build up inside you.
- In moments of severe fury, give yourself 10 minutes. Ask yourself, “do I deserve this misery and anger”?
What if you are going to do it anyway?
Well, we guess the train has left the station. If you are persistent to go for it, Take this as revenge sex law
“Choose someone best”
If you are doing it, do it the right way, and what is the point anyway if you are not doing it with someone best? Don’t pick some random stranger to satisfy your rage.
How to replace revenge sex with good sex?
Sex is your right and you can do it with whomever you want. If you want to engage yourself in sexual activities, you can but make yourself a priority. The drive to Vindication only gives you the baseline for making bad choices. Keep in mind that whatever you are doing, will have an impact on you and only you. The other person doesn’t care who you sleep with. If they had any concerns, you wouldn’t have ended up here in the first place. So make a choice that pleases you.
Best of luck!